Ooooff. This really resonates. I’ve struggled to know whether what I’m feeling is valid, or whether it’s all in my head. Do people really not care? Or am I overly critical and demanding of my friendships (even though I’ve asked for nothing)? It feels as though I’m the go-to person to open up to and ask advice of, but at what point do people stop seeing me as a free counsellor and adviser just because I’m level headed, or capable like you say. Sometimes I think it’s because I’m single and childfree that people assume I have endless time and energy to absorb their problems and feelings. Maybe they’d be happy to do the same for me - but I always feel like I’m the one making the moves, planning a get together, and fair enough? They have kids, husbands, their priorities are different. Maybe I need to accept I’m not the priority of my friends and coworkers… and figure out how I feel about that and adjust my output to them accordingly. Or maybe - we just have different ways of communicating and they need to have things spelled out for them a bit more.
It really is a curse and a gift to be able to read people so well! Others just have different gifts, and perhaps we can look for those little gems in other people instead of being disappointed they cannot reciprocate our exact behaviour back to us?
Ugh. I’m sorry I don’t have the answers, but I am weirdly glad I’m not alone and hope you find your way out soon. (Though it seems you already know you will, because we’re capable and we always do) ❤️
Thank you so much for reading and for leaving such a lovely, honest and thoughtful comment. I found a lot of comfort in this 🥹 I’m sure one day we’ll feel as wanted as we make others feel 🤍
Thank you so much for this piece. I resonate so much with never feeling like others see me as much as I see them. I’m currently facing struggles with just being considered in my romantic relationship. Everything you wrote about is exactly how I feel and have felt. It’s nice to know even though loneliness can consume you, there really are others who experience the life I also experience. Thank you again so much for validating very real and sometimes difficult feelings to experience and process.
Thank you so much for taking the time to leave me this comment, because I wrote this in the middle of the night in the depths of loneliness. It makes me feel less alone when someone can so clearly see themselves in my words, thank you so much 🥹 I really hope the issues you’re facing are somehow resolved, sometimes all we want is to be noticed and considered - it doesn’t seem like that much of an ask but it’s so hard to get sometimes 🤍
This deeply resonates. So many feelings I have felt soooo many times. I don't think it's your fault. I do think that people are overly selfish these days. No one seems to notice what's going on outside of their own personal bubbles and they really should. It's not fair to take and take and take and never give anything back. I don't have a solution because, as I said, I feel this too. But it's not your fault that others are not giving you what you need.
This honestly has me extremely choked up. Not only did you describe exactly how I have felt all 20 years of my life. But I felt as though I wasn’t losing my mind. Thank you😊
Thank you so much for reading, waking up to this comment means so much to me 🥺 I’m so glad you could relate and find a little comfort in it. We’re not alone 💗
This honestly hurts because I can easily sense things with others but others don’t for me since I make myself look capable and so they don’t expect. Even though my best friends always ask if I’m doing fine and if I’m alright I’ll always mask it because I hate the idea of not seeming put together. I’ve been able to talk about my struggles a bit with my loved ones but I still back away because there’s this part of me that can’t bare to deal with it for some reason. It’s so strange to feel so seen by a complete stranger on the internet.
I completely understand how you feel, and I see you 💗 It’s so hard to balance our need to be seen and known as capable, with letting people come to our rescue now and again. My problem is I just feel that no one pays enough attention to notice what I need, I’m not sure how to solve that though. I hope you found some comfort and reassurance in this, I really appreciate you reading and taking the time to share your feelings with me 🥺
Honestly I know you were simply writing what you felt but it honestly it made me realize a lot of things and that I want to change that side of me that’s shy or scared of showing the imperfect parts of me. I hope you find solace in your feelings and that you’ll be able to figure out how to let others see your struggles without feeling the need to hide it🫶
I’m going through a break up right now and this soooooo puts into words a feeling that I’ve had about myself for so long. It always felt kind of selfish to label myself as the one that cared more, probably because I don’t want to give myself any kind of “credit”. I think this is something I will inevitably come back to in those strange moments when someone doesn’t remember something that I felt they should, and I feel like curling up into a ball and disappearing. Thank you for sharing❤️
Thank you so much for reading, and I really hope you could find some comfort in this 🥺 it’s hard to accept/label ourselves as “more” I think, it feels dismissive to say that we care more than other people do but I think it’s important for us to recognise sometimes 💗
I’m so glad this found its way to you! Thank you so much for reading and leaving a comment, it’s so comforting to know that other people feel the same way 🤍
Thank you so much for sharing. Knowing I’m not the only one who feels this way - treading that fine line between self-reflection, self-absorption and resentment to those who love me - is really lovely
Crying. This is quite literally how I’ve been feeling for a while now. I often end up wondering am I overthinking? Am I overreacting? I can’t help but constantly invalidate and intellectualise my feelings. It hurts when you realise you weren’t wrong to feel the way you’ve been feeling it’s just human. Thank you for sharing this and for being so raw.
This almost made me cry. I really have nothing to say except I see you. I’m right there with you.
Thank you so much, it’s so reassuring to know other people feel the same way 🥺 thank you so much for reading, your comment really made my day.
Ooooff. This really resonates. I’ve struggled to know whether what I’m feeling is valid, or whether it’s all in my head. Do people really not care? Or am I overly critical and demanding of my friendships (even though I’ve asked for nothing)? It feels as though I’m the go-to person to open up to and ask advice of, but at what point do people stop seeing me as a free counsellor and adviser just because I’m level headed, or capable like you say. Sometimes I think it’s because I’m single and childfree that people assume I have endless time and energy to absorb their problems and feelings. Maybe they’d be happy to do the same for me - but I always feel like I’m the one making the moves, planning a get together, and fair enough? They have kids, husbands, their priorities are different. Maybe I need to accept I’m not the priority of my friends and coworkers… and figure out how I feel about that and adjust my output to them accordingly. Or maybe - we just have different ways of communicating and they need to have things spelled out for them a bit more.
It really is a curse and a gift to be able to read people so well! Others just have different gifts, and perhaps we can look for those little gems in other people instead of being disappointed they cannot reciprocate our exact behaviour back to us?
Ugh. I’m sorry I don’t have the answers, but I am weirdly glad I’m not alone and hope you find your way out soon. (Though it seems you already know you will, because we’re capable and we always do) ❤️
Thank you so much for reading and for leaving such a lovely, honest and thoughtful comment. I found a lot of comfort in this 🥹 I’m sure one day we’ll feel as wanted as we make others feel 🤍
Thank you so much for this piece. I resonate so much with never feeling like others see me as much as I see them. I’m currently facing struggles with just being considered in my romantic relationship. Everything you wrote about is exactly how I feel and have felt. It’s nice to know even though loneliness can consume you, there really are others who experience the life I also experience. Thank you again so much for validating very real and sometimes difficult feelings to experience and process.
Thank you so much for taking the time to leave me this comment, because I wrote this in the middle of the night in the depths of loneliness. It makes me feel less alone when someone can so clearly see themselves in my words, thank you so much 🥹 I really hope the issues you’re facing are somehow resolved, sometimes all we want is to be noticed and considered - it doesn’t seem like that much of an ask but it’s so hard to get sometimes 🤍
This deeply resonates. So many feelings I have felt soooo many times. I don't think it's your fault. I do think that people are overly selfish these days. No one seems to notice what's going on outside of their own personal bubbles and they really should. It's not fair to take and take and take and never give anything back. I don't have a solution because, as I said, I feel this too. But it's not your fault that others are not giving you what you need.
This honestly has me extremely choked up. Not only did you describe exactly how I have felt all 20 years of my life. But I felt as though I wasn’t losing my mind. Thank you😊
Thank you so much for reading, waking up to this comment means so much to me 🥺 I’m so glad you could relate and find a little comfort in it. We’re not alone 💗
Thank you for this raw piece! I feel so seen, and I see you! I haven’t cried to an online read in a long while! This was beautiful in so many ways.
This honestly hurts because I can easily sense things with others but others don’t for me since I make myself look capable and so they don’t expect. Even though my best friends always ask if I’m doing fine and if I’m alright I’ll always mask it because I hate the idea of not seeming put together. I’ve been able to talk about my struggles a bit with my loved ones but I still back away because there’s this part of me that can’t bare to deal with it for some reason. It’s so strange to feel so seen by a complete stranger on the internet.
I completely understand how you feel, and I see you 💗 It’s so hard to balance our need to be seen and known as capable, with letting people come to our rescue now and again. My problem is I just feel that no one pays enough attention to notice what I need, I’m not sure how to solve that though. I hope you found some comfort and reassurance in this, I really appreciate you reading and taking the time to share your feelings with me 🥺
Honestly I know you were simply writing what you felt but it honestly it made me realize a lot of things and that I want to change that side of me that’s shy or scared of showing the imperfect parts of me. I hope you find solace in your feelings and that you’ll be able to figure out how to let others see your struggles without feeling the need to hide it🫶
sending you hug from afar 🫂
Thank you so much 🥹
I’m going through a break up right now and this soooooo puts into words a feeling that I’ve had about myself for so long. It always felt kind of selfish to label myself as the one that cared more, probably because I don’t want to give myself any kind of “credit”. I think this is something I will inevitably come back to in those strange moments when someone doesn’t remember something that I felt they should, and I feel like curling up into a ball and disappearing. Thank you for sharing❤️
Thank you so much for reading, and I really hope you could find some comfort in this 🥺 it’s hard to accept/label ourselves as “more” I think, it feels dismissive to say that we care more than other people do but I think it’s important for us to recognise sometimes 💗
So compellingly beautiful 🤍
Thank you so much, that is so kind of you 🥹
This came right at the moment I desperately needed it! Thank you🤍
I’m so glad this found its way to you! Thank you so much for reading and leaving a comment, it’s so comforting to know that other people feel the same way 🤍
Thank you so much for sharing. Knowing I’m not the only one who feels this way - treading that fine line between self-reflection, self-absorption and resentment to those who love me - is really lovely
Crying. This is quite literally how I’ve been feeling for a while now. I often end up wondering am I overthinking? Am I overreacting? I can’t help but constantly invalidate and intellectualise my feelings. It hurts when you realise you weren’t wrong to feel the way you’ve been feeling it’s just human. Thank you for sharing this and for being so raw.